For me, cooking has been a rough learning experience. I even have a few battle scars! Okay, okay, tiny scrapes that have pretty much healed and look almost like my normal skin again, but hey, they count! I’ve heard that you learn through each failure, but if that were true, I’d be on the show Top Chef by now.
I can pinpoint some reasons that
rocket science cooking is so difficult for me:
- I miscalculate the time it takes before something burns. Are there general cooking times and temperatures for food groups listed anywhere?
- I can’t read a recipe. Can I read? Yes. Can I read a recipe? No. What’s the difference? A recipe is a sequence of words that all of a sudden form another language – one that I am not fluent in. Sautee, baste, al dente, fold, deglaze, render, dredge, clarify… what? What does all this stuff mean?
- I am a bit impatient. Maybe I should have a snack before I cook because the tiny Incredible Hulk in me wants the meal done NOW.
- I am afraid to over season, therefore I always under season – which is almost as bad.
- I was raised on Irish, German and Polish food while my husband loves soul food. See my dilemma there?
The bottom line is that I just don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know what seasonings go with what foods, what is considered a pinch or heaping teaspoon or what “sounds right/wrong” about a recipe (ie. not enough butter, too much milk, missing some binding/thickening agent). I’ve tried learning from cooking shows, but the chefs have zero consideration for the muffin top that I am trying to lose. Every recipe has so much sugar, butter and all the fatty fatness that makes a dish taste magical, but wouldn’t be consumed by someone trying to eat even slightly healthy. Where the hell do they find these weird ingredients? Am I supposed to travel to Madagascar to get a fresh vanilla bean or can I just get one from the grocery store? And they are always cooking some fancy food that I have never heard of like remoulade, bechamel sauce or corque monsieur. Can I just get a basic meatloaf recipe?
I digress… I’m still trying though. Recently, I began looking on Pinterest and The Pioneer Woman’s websites for recipes and my food has gotten a little better! See! I listen to your suggestions. Check out my creations (the good, the bad and the ugly) on my Instagram page! And as always, leave me some tips in the comment section pleeeeeease! (The extra eeeee’s are a plea from my husband, lol.).